Confidence Builder

I have to tell you that since I have started working at the Arabian farm, it has really helped my confidence working around horses. When I first started my job, I thought that I might have some fear issues, especially with what happened with Fritzy a few years ago. Even though I am only handling horses from the ground at this time, some of them can be quite a handful, especially the 2 yr olds. I really thought that I would be fearful handling some of the hot heads, but I have realized that the more confidence I have, the easier it is to handle them.

I find myself doubting my abilities from time to time, especially working around top trainers, I sometimes feel like I am not good enough. Sometimes I feel like I am a horse newbie, but in reality I have many, many years working with horses. I think working with top notch trainers can make one feel this way, especially one that has never experienced this level of horses. By this level, I mean this level of showing and the whole show barn environment.

Remember I am a small town girl that grew up in the sticks..... riding and showing well broke horses. My sister and I learned to ride from a neighbor of ours, and everything else we did, we pretty much learned on our own, or through our 4-H group. We kept our horses at home. We didn't have money for top trainers, high end tack and $20,000 horses (back then) and the like. We read horse magazines and books, and basically fumbled along as we got older. I remember showing at the county Fair, some of the girls had the $20,000 horses, high end tack and top trainers. They always won the championships and headed off to our state Fair. I always felt sorry for the kids that were worse off then we were, you knew that they weren't going to win a blue ribbon, but they went into that show ring and gave it their all, and had fun while doing it.

I won numerous blue ribbons, reserve and grand championships with my $1,200.00 show horse, borrowed show saddle and bridle, and the help of my horses previous owner. But I never made it to the state Fair, nor did I ever show in bigger shows. I only showed 4-H and some local open shows. Sometimes I wish we could have gone to bigger shows, but then I realized I was just lucky to be able to own and show horses at all. It was a great experience and one I will never forget.

So now that I have entered the "big" horse show world, even though I am not showing, I finally get to experience what this level is like. And I have realized that there is so much more then just "handling" the horses. My barn manager/trainer tells us all the time that we are all involved in the horses training. The babies aren't handled much until they are 2 yrs old, and there have been a few times that I have thought some of them were going to knock me on my butt. This has helped my confidence in handling unruly horses, and everything I do is training them. I can only make them better. Hopefully! I have already noticed a difference in 3 of the 2 yr olds I handle on a daily basis. Even the horse that I have nicknamed "Physco" has grown on me. She will never be able to be shown because she is not mentally stable, and I use to dread having to handle her, but I have learned how to handle her "issue's" and because of that, I don't "dread" when I have to get her out of her stall anymore.

I am very happy that I was given this opportunity to not just be involved in the daily handling of the horses, but to also be involved in their training. I have not only built my confidence handling horses with different personalities, but it has helped me build my confidence working with my own horses, especially Fritzy. I think when I can start working with Fritzy again, especially riding, I can feel confident that she and I will be on the same page. I think I will be able to let some of my fear go, if not all of it. I might feel a twinge of fear from time to time, but this job has really helped me overcome a lot of my insecurities.

Now if only the temperature would rise out of the 20's, and if the ground would unthaw, I might be able to get outside to do something with my own horses!